We've seen Fabuloso, a cleaning product, at various locations, so when we were getting cleaning supplies we decided to give it a try.

Well, I think part of the problem was the fact that the mop just sort of picked up the dirt and redistributed it in a thinner layer.  But the fumes from the Fabuloso are stuck in the back of my throat, aggravating the already sore section.  :-p  And it's not clearing out, despite open windows and fans going.  It's like a sickly-sweet thick scent.

From now on, I'm sticking to Pine-Sol.

Not only am I still bored, but now I'm morose, a condition exacerbated by my dropping my bowl of comfort ice cream on the floor this morning.

I need to clean. Seriously. The kitchen disgusts me, and it takes a lot to disgust me, cleaning-wise. I'm working on reclaiming the guest room as a guest room and our bedroom as our bedroom, since it's been a month now that Matt and I've been sleeping in the guest room (ever since the waterbed sprung a leak and we slept in there while the patch was sealing). I have a guest coming in two weeks, and she'll need the guest room.

But while the flesh is willing to clean, the spirit is in a blue funk and just can't seem to handle the mounting mountain of dishes, laundry, and other varied and sundry cleaning duties. Matt's too tired to do any of it, between work, school and meeting. He'll try. But it doesn't last.

Add in medication that makes me feel like I constantly have to pee, and a growing obsession with having meals at the lake, and I am in a seriously weird state of mind. I don't want to deal with decisions. Even something as simple as, "Do you want broccoli on your pizza?" sets me off screaming, "I don't care, just make a freaking decision!!!" I know he's trying to be helpful, but I just want the pizza, I don't care what's on it anymore.

I need time off from work. A lot of time. Like two weeks. Two weeks where I can get this place together, plus get in some rest and hopefully not have to worry about anyone else's needs. Not going to happen, as I'm only part-time and don't have vacation time or anything, but it would be nice.

Must have been allergies to something. Second day of Claritin, and the itch seems to have subsided. Plus, I've been doing laundry all day. Pretty much washing all the clothes and bedding in the apartment, as we have a serious problem when it comes to folding and putting away laundry. So, a lot of it spills over, and we can't tell what's clean and what's not. So, it's all getting washed again, and I'm actually folding and putting away, too! Plus, I swept the bathroom floor and scrubbed the counter. I'm feeling pretty damn good about myself today, I think.

Second day of circuit assembly today. Yay. Whoopie. Another 2-hour car trip, then five hours or so of "uplifting" talks, then two hours in the car back home.

Can't I go back to bed?

ETA: I'm not going today. Matt's letting me stay home, as I was in a bad mental state yesterday, and woke up totally cranky and tired today. Part of that is the inlaws being here. I love my inlaws, but I just don't like having other people in the house. Sets me off instantly. I just want to be left alone. I don't want three people asking me, "Are you going to eat your muffin?" when I've already answered the damn question once, loudly. The answer hasn't changed.

I'm curled around my coffee mug like Gollum and his precious. Caffeine, sweet caffeine. I need something to make me sane, to keep me from snapping, from going off the cliffs of insanity once again.

I think I'll start the dishwasher and go back to bed. They'll all be gone until five or six, so maybe I can get some kitchen cleaning done.

See, Thursday, Matt kept telling me, "Oh, the parents won't be here until seven or eight tonight." Wrong. They left Ohio at FOUR IN THE FREAKING MORNING. So they were here at three in the afternoon. No warning. No time to get the kitchen fully cleaned. So there are still lots of dishes on the counters, and I know Matt gets annoyed that he can't get to the counters. I got annoyed this morning when I went to make coffee and had to bang and crash around to get to the coffee maker. Plus, the carafe decided it didn't want to pour straight today, so I got water all over the counter, and later coffee down the side of the cup as I tried to fill it.

I don't celebrate Christmas anymore, but if I did, I know what I'd be asking for. A heaping dose of sanity and mental well-being. But as a friend of mine pointed out, when you don't celebrate Christmas or birthdays, people don't tend to get you gifts. So no sanity for me this year. Unless once Matt gets some more certifications and can get his dream job with my dream insurance. Full mental health coverage would be a beautiful thing.

Oh, and Lime Shrimp Ramen sucks ass. Sort of tastes like it, too. And three-day-old Lime Shrimp Ramen definitely SMELLS like ass. I'm gonna go start the dishwasher and go back to bed.

As a belated 11-month anniversary present to my husband, I cleaned the bathroom. Sort of. I did the toilet, the sinks/counter, and the mirror. Those faucets SPARKLE.

Why is this a "gift?" Because I hate cleaning. I think this is only the second time since we've moved here that I've willing cleaned the bathroom. But he likes things to be clean. It makes him happy. So as a present, I cleaned the bathroom. Not quite done yet, I still need to do laundry (the never-ending curse) and sweep/mop the floor. But when he arrives home at 5:30 (in yikes, 2.5 hours), the bathroom will be pretty, and he will be pleased.

Now what to do for the one-year, next month.... (ponders)

I talked to Matt Friday about the dishes thing. He agreed that yes, he and Chris (read: Matt) should do the big dishes every night. So Friday night, he comes home from work...too tired to do dishes. And nothing got done Saturday night. Sunday we had leftovers, so nothing. And here it is, Monday morning, and my "job" for the day is (drumroll please) doing the big dishes that piled up over the weekend. (screams, tears hair out)

Plus, there's no money for grocery shopping this week (as far as I know), so I won't be following the menus in the book. Who knows what we'll end up having. (bangs head on desk)

My life was not supposed to turn out like this. I was not supposed to be a crazy housewife maid. I hate cleaning. I chose to get married on an equinox thinking it would symbolize equality in everything in the marriage. Yes, I respect him as my head. But that doesn't mean I should get shafted with all the dishes!!!! Hell, the roommate should help more than starting the dishwasher now and then.

He doesn't understand when I rant about being the primary dishwasher all through high school. He claims that should have trained me to do dishes. I explain, over and over, that it conditioned me to hate cleaning and doing dishes. The longer I spend doing dishes, the worse my mood gets. I'm ready to kill by the time I finish. Seeing bare counters scares me. It's not normal!! Just thinking about having to scrub pots and pans today is making me upset. I don't want to do it. I really don't want to do it. I want to work on my sewing, work on the two outfits I have planned so I can have some spending money. But if I don't get the kitchen clean, I'll get a lecture that I don't want to deal with, either.

(frustrated sigh) This would be good motivation to get a job. He wouldn't be able to use the "but you're home more" argument as to why I have to clean. Get a job that takes me out of state three months at a time and pays to put me up in a hotel and eat out. Anyone know a job like that?

Well, I'm on day six of the 30-day eating plan. Most of the recipes were decent (the meatloaf left a little to be desired, but thanks to Matt, I've become a meatloaf snob). The only problem I've had with it recently is that some days, even with the eating every 3 hours...I get hungry every hour and a half. :-P

Oh, and I've spent nearly $200 on groceries this week. I tell myself that a good portion of the things I've bought are "pantry" items, items that aren't just for this week. But then I look over the menus and realize how much I've left off the menu/shopping list (like, all the different flakes and seeds and nuts needed for the multi-grain cereal, and capers, and pine nuts...). Add in that husband and roommate still need "normal" things like bread, lunchmeat, and cheese, and I don't feel too bad about the grocery budget for this past week. And where ARE capers and pine nuts in the grocery stores?? I looked for capers with salad items, with pickles, with italian...I looked for pine nuts with baking nuts, with snack nuts, with international foods...nothing.

I haven't even had a chance to look at what I need for next week. o_O; And I don't know if I'll have anything money-wise for groceries for next week. Chris gave me $25, but that all went into still-needed items for today and tomorrow. Oh, and milk. Those boys burn through milk like nothing I've ever seen before.

And it's been too hot to motivate myself to get across the street to the fitness center. But I put Walk Away the Pounds on the top of my Netflix list, so it should be here soon. We'll see if I like it. If I do, I'll see about getting Chris to copy it for me until I can afford to buy a copy for myself.

I need to do some sewing so I can afford to pick up Half-Blood Prince this weekend or so. One of the downfalls about being a stay-at-home wife: no income of my own to spend as I wish. Unless I do little projects like the sewing, I don't have any "mad money." I just haven't had the energy to sew. Or clean. Or workout. Or do anything other than sit at my computer, watch tv, or nap. I'm wondering if it's because I'm back on my pills. If that's so, I hope this levels out after the first few batches of pills. I'd hate to lose the first week of every pack to hormone-related fatigue.

Plus Chris's parents are coming in this weekend, so it falls to me, the stay-at-home, to clean. I tried using the "but they're not my parents, I don't care what they think" approach in arguing against it, but Matt trumped me with the "but you're home more" approach. (grump, sulk) Besides, isn't there a universal kitchen law that states "The one who cooks is exempt from the cleanup?" I do fracking all the cooking. Matt and Chris should be able to pitch in and do a load of dishes. And I don't mean just tossing what can go in, into the dishwasher, adding a tablet and starting it. I mean the heavy-duty cleanup. The pots and pans that don't go in the dishwasher. Why can't they team up after dinner and wash them? One wash, one dry and put away. I spent an hour or more on dinner, it's the least they could do. Or even just put the fracking leftovers away. (sigh)

But on the plus side, Sci-Fi Friday starts up again tonight. New SG-1, new Atlantis (we're rooting for the Wraith, is that bad?), and new Galactica!!! I'm excited. I'll be watching the first section by myself, most likely, as Matt doesn't get out of work until 8 at the earliest and it takes him half an hour to get home, and as mentioned above, Chris's parents are coming into town. Too bad I don't have an air popper. That'd be the perfect time to have the 3 cups air-popped popcorn allowed as a snack. I'll make do with the apples an yogurt. Mmmm.

Sunday, we cleaned the bedroom.  We found several wads of cotton under the bed.  That reminded me of this strip.

I don't think I want to know what happened to the strings...

I seem to have been in a cleaning mood today.  I finally did the hand-dishes, cleaned the kitchen floor, did laundry without being asked, reorganized the closet, again, picked up some things in the bedroom, and finally mended the shirt Matt's needed mended for a year. 

These moods are rare.  I try to take advantage of them when they come. 

Well, it's the start of week four of my diet and exercise regime. I'm down about 15 or 20 lbs. I had a sabotaged week when I went back into the workforce and quit. Last weekend was shot when hubby was home and we celebrated anniversary. I was actually doing okay until 2 things: 1) hubby bought a ginormous bag of Reeses Pieces, and 2) I let him serve my lunch Sunday, and he put half my day's allotment of food into that one meal.

But, I'm back on track today. I did my weights, and I may be going walking later (if the sky stays clear). I need to wash off my water bottle, take my vitamins, and eat lunch. I still need to get back into the habit of eating breakfast when I get up, instead of getting absorbed into my computer and the tv.

I also need to pick up the apartment today. My friend comes out for a visit this weekend, and even though we roomed together for four years in college, and she knows I'm a slob, I'd still like the place to look nice. That and she's meeting my husband for the first time. I think she's still worried that I hooked up with someone wrong for me, like all my old boyfriends. I'm hoping that when she sees Matt, sees us together, she'll realize I made the exact right choice.

Well, I'm back on my walking schedule again. It was 68 degrees with 69% humidity. Yikes. I really really really need to get a shower, but the diswasher is running and I don't know if my poor little water heater can handle both at once. Hopefully the dishwasher will stop soon and I can go hose off (and play with my new razor, yay).

Then I get to scrub the kitchen floor. Whoopie. :-P

Sometimes I think being the housewife really isn't all it's cracked up to be. Then I remember being in the work force, and think, "Hey, what's scrubbing a floor once a week, after all?"

Still, it would be nice to get a paycheck for it. :-P

Okay, so I saw the three vehicles pull into the parking lot, called Cyn to come over with big scary dog (naw, Candy's a sweetheart, she's not REALLY scary). Cyn came over, we hung out a bit (at least an hour). When I looked out the window, the three vehicles were at the next building over. So, either they didn't need to come into my apartment, or they started at the wrong building. Cyn went home (her sleep cycle got seriously disturbed today), so I hope the big scary men are done with this building.

Day three of diet and exercise. It's amazing how quickly I got filled up from an apple and a handful of carrots. Had a Wasa fiber rye crisp, too. Not doing as well on the water-drinking today. Haven't even had a full 2 cups yet. But that'll change as I start to work on cleaning the bedroom. Matt's a little perturbed that he can't walk around the bed without stepping on stuff. But at least he said it is partly his fault, too, since he hasn't done anything to clean it, either.

We're still confused at how many clothes we seem to go through. Of course, now that he's working 5 days a week, wearing shirt and tie, he's going to have more laundry. I think one of the first purchases once he gets paid should be another packet or two of underwear for him. Why is it guys will wear their boxers until all that's left is the waistband and a few stubborn threads?

Poor guy works a 12-hour shift today. At least he's off tomorrow. We can go to the gym together! :)

Off to work on cleaning...joy. :-P

Okay, so after my one promising night, I haven't written anymore. Bleargh.

And I'm now sort-of a housewife. IE, husband is working, I'm not. Which means he expects me to be trying to keep the house neat. I've tried explaining to him that such things do not come naturally to me. It doesn't occur to me to clean. I've had dishes sit waiting to be washed so long that they've formed their own ecosystems. But I'm married now. And husband isn't as fond of disorganization and clutter as I am. So I have to try to remember to clean, to put things away, to do something other than play on the computer all day, and while working out is a good thing, I can't use that as an excuse for why I didn't clean.

I hate cleaning. Clean houses make me nervous. I NEED clutter to feel like I belong there.

Plus since he's working on Saturdays now, I have to go to book study by myself. I'm so tempted to skip it. I don't want to go by myself. It might be easier to slip out unnoticed, though. I don't like talking to people. Eh, I have to go out anyway to get milk and eggs. (sigh)

They came today and set everything up. So we're on the second load of whites. Plans for the day? Laundry, laundry and more laundry. But I think I'm going to get food first. Matt made lasagna last night. Mmm.

When we moved down here, we had Matt's old washer. It worked, but damn, was it noisy, and it tried to walk across the floor a few times. His parents sent us $300 to buy a drier. Well, with his $100 medical bill, we figured we could get a used one for $200 or so. So, off to the used appliance store with our roommate. The plan was, Chris would charge it, and we'd give him half out of the check.

We found a matched set of washer and drier for $300.

So, with letting them have the old washer, he let us have the set for $325, including tax and delivery. Paid for it Tuesday, it was to be delivered Thursday morning.

Flash to today, Thursday, morning. Phone rings. After I figure out that's what it is and answer it, the guy tells us both his delivery people called in with the flu and one has the truck. So, no delivery today, but delivery tomorrow, unless we want to run out and get the washer and drier. We _do_ have access to a minivan today, but thinking about it, that means we'd have to haul the old washer out there (we're on the second floor) and then haul the newer washer and drier up to the second floor, install them ourselves, etc...

I'm thinking laundry can wait til tomorrow. :-P

I have an interview Tuesday. Still retail, still office supplies/copy center, but a different company. Plus, one of the stores down here from my previous company is waiting on a c.c. lead, and if she falls through, they'll give me a call. So, keeping fingers crossed.

I seriously need to do some work on the bedroom. When our roommate cleaned the living room, all the boxes went in my husband and my bedroom and the spare room. So now it's incredibly difficult to get to the bed. And it's a waterbed, so I can't walk across the bed to get to the other side. Makes it real difficult for anyone sleeping on the far side to get up in the middle of the night (bathroom, let cat out, let cat in, let cat out, let cat in, let cat out, etc).

Star Trek 3 is on, hubby and roomie are watching. I'm still happy-happy that I got some of my simmies to do what I wanted...and one set I didn't even use hacks on! But now there are 2 adults and 6 teenage boys in that teeny-tiny house. Need to get some of those kids grown up, moved out, and married. At least two of the boys have crushes. One's going steady. So, that could work.

I am way too into that game. I haven't touched Galaxies since I installed Sims 2.

Still haven't totally unpacked. The spare bedroom is a mess of boxes, most labelled "misc. crap." Plus one of the cats threw up in there today.

Sigh. I need a cookie.

Haven't worked on the game much this week. I got the first season of X-Men: Evolution on DVD from Netflix, and was watching it incessantly. I miss cable. :(

I've been doing the "happy housewife" routine, despite still being single. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, all while still working 36-40 hours a week. I'm so tired.

So tired.

So.

Tired.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..............